Kitty BITE Back Series Episode 25: Why do you hate families so much liMes?? (god do I f*ing hate u)

Heyyyoooo! Today we are going to cover the 23rd component of Behavior Control under the BITE Model as described by SAH: separation of families. Were families separated in the cult? Were they encouraged to maintain relationships with their (non-cult member) family? Or no? Did this include children? Who all was being separated? It's honestly sickening to think about.

STORY TIME!

• When I was in the cult, many times the leader would rip families apart and keep them separated; specifically when some of the family wasn't involved in the cult. I remember a few instances I want to mention. There was a family in the cult. They grew up in the cult. There was a great-grandmother, grandmother, 2 daughters, and multiple (5+) grandchildren. One of the sisters, her husband, and their child left the cult while I was in it. The rest of the family continued to be involved in the cult. The cult leader would stand up at the pulpit and name this sister, talk about how she was going to be condemned to hell along with the child and her husband- because they had left the cult. He specifically told the family that if they didn't excommunicate them, that their souls would also be in jeopardy. So what did this family do? They excommunicated the sister, her husband, and child. On top of this, the cult was told to exile them; not even speak to them in the grocery store. But why did the cult leader do this? Why did he feel so strongly that is any of the members were friends with or even friendly to this woman and her family that they would be in jeopardy of burning forever for eternity? And that answer is actually pretty simple: he didn't want us to know how warped and crazy the cult really was. If the members were friends with other non-members, there would be a chance that the member would be "influenced" by the non-member and "backslide" and become "worldly". It's like those ultra-christian parents that think going to college will corrupt their children. When in reality, they are just seeing things from a broader and less narrow minded perspective. Another time there was a family of a grandmother, son, SIL, and 2 children. The grandmother was in church and the son was in and out of jail. The ex-SIL didn't want her children going to the cult's services. The grandmother would take them when they were at the dad's and bring them to the services. I remember the kids being filthy and in need of a bath and a warm meal. The cult leader encouraged the grandmother to keep the children from their mother while the son was in jail so that they could "be exposed to the word of god". The cult leader almost made it his personal vendetta to keep families who were "unequally yolked" separated. He knew that deep down if he didn't intimidate the members to excommunicate their "worldly" family that they would start to question his teaching and doctrine. And you know what, that's exactly what would have happened. One that hits very close to home form me is when he wanted my mom to excommunicate and kick out my elderly grandmother. He knew that my grandmother who was over 75 years old (I don't remember her exact age) didn't believe in the teachings of the cult and really was trying to get my mom and I to leave. My mom was the main caregiver of my grandmother and without my mom, she would have had to live in a nursing home or assisted living facility. My mom never caved on this. She never kicked my grandmother out or excommunicated her. Although she and my mom had a very tumultuous relationship after we joined the cult. Eventually my grandmother went into hospice care and passed when I was in the 8th grade (2008). He really did everything he could to try and keep families separate so that the members would stay loyal to his cause (his wallet and ego).

If you or anyone you know is being separated from their family by a group of people or a leader of a group, please contact the authorities. I cannot stress to you enough that this is a life threatening situation. These people are ruthless.

Until all those families are reunited and safe, may your own relationships within your family wither away.